


Wants

by rosetintmyworld



Series: Dead Water [6]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Beta Jaehyun, Implied Taeyong/manager, M/M, Omega Lee Taeyong, One-Sided Relationship, One-sided Jaeyong, Referenced sexual situations, a/b/o dynamics, broken jaeyong
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-16
Updated: 2019-04-07
Packaged: 2019-10-10 23:56:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 11
Words: 15,590
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17435930
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosetintmyworld/pseuds/rosetintmyworld
Summary: They all want different things.





	1. Wants

Jaehyun watched as Taeyong walked into the house, tugging at his jacket on the way in. 

“Hey hyung,” Jaehyun greeted the omega who jumped a little as if he were just noticing that Jaehyun was sitting on the couch before waving at him. Jaehyun got off of the couch, following Taeyong as he headed downstairs. 

“Johnny here?” Taeyong asked, not even looking back, like he knew the beta would be following him. 

Jaehyun hated that he fell into the trap. 

“No, he went to the other dorm to talk to Ten,” Jaehyun answered, leaning in the doorway. “Okay, that’ll give me some time to clean this place up,” Taeyong said as he looked around the room and Jaehyun raised his eyebrow, but let it go. It wasn’t like he could say anything to the omega. Taeyong was a neat omega, and he liked things clean to almost an alarming degree. Jaehyun liked to entertain the idea of him moving into the dream dorm, just because that would be a wild thought, seeing him over run by the messy kids. 

He was lucky that Donghyuck liked to keep their room clean. 

“Are any of the omegas actually here tonight?” Taeyong asked and Jaehyun thought back.”

“Winwin is here I think, Doyoung went to dinner with his brother though,” Jaehyun pointed out and Taeyong hummed, bending over in his closet to retrieve a new shirt. 

Taeyong was currently working on his comeback with Ten. It was nice for the two omegas to get to come back and they seemed to enjoy the music style. Jaehun thought it fit the omegas, Taeyong especially. There was something about the omega that fit the persona, that personified the huskily sang lyrics. Jaehyun thought that it was a good concept match and Taeyong shined in it. Although Jaehyun thought that about most of the things Taeyong did. Taeyong was a wonderful omega, smart, responsible, level-headed, sexy. He was amazing.

As much as Jaehyun thought that, he knew that it didn’t really matter. 

Taeyong was all of those things, but most importantly, he was uninterested in the Beta. Taeyong seemed to be solely interested in Alphas, didn’t even seem to give Jaehyun a second glance. 

Jaehyun liked Taeyong’s scent, he thought the Champagne meshed beautifully with the basil of his own scent, he thought their personalities fit, but that wasn’t enough. 

Jaehyun tried to pull his eyes away from where the omega was bent over before noticing that there were bruises in the dips of his hips. Jaehyun was used to seeing the team with bruises, they were dancers, they were guaranteed to have to slide across a floor, or fall to their knees suddenly, to hit body parts in an effort to get a move perfect, but this was different. 

“Jaehyun, you’re staring again,” Taeyong said, shaking his hips from side to side teasingly.

Jaehyun would normally turn red and shy away from the omega, but not this time. 

“What’s wrong?” Taeyong asked, pulling his shirt off before replacing it just as quick. They’d all seen each other in states of undress, so it wasn’t like it was a big deal to Taeyong, but it was a big deal to Jaehyun as he realized that the bruises went further up his back, but these were mouth shaped and-

“What happened?” Jaehyun asked and Taeyong turned to look at the beta.

“What are you talking about?” Taeyong asked.

“Tell me what happened- Did YJ hurt you? I’m going to fucking kill him,” Jaehyun swore and Taeyong crossed his arms. 

“Did he hurt me? What are you talking about?” Taeyong asked and Jaehyun stalked up to him, lifting his shirt. 

“You’re covered in bruises, Taeyong, I swear you don’t have to be afraid of him. He won’t hurt you anymore,” Jaehyun promised and Taeyong pulled away from him.

“I’m not afraid, and he didn’t hurt me,” Taeyong complained, his voice small. Jaehyun could smell the chlorine scent wafting off of the omega, distorting his sweet sultry scent. 

“I can smell you, you don’t have to be embarrassed. You know that right?” Jaehyun reassured him and Taeyong snorted. 

“If you knew- if you knew what was wrong with me, you’d understand why I’m embarrassed,” Taeyong said and Jaehyun shook his head. 

“You don’t have any reason to be embarrassed. I’m going to fucking kill him,” Jaehyun swore and Taeyong raised his eyebrow. 

“You, a beta, is going to fight an alpha, over me? You’ll get yourself killed. Leave it,” Taeyong cautioned. 

“You of all should recognize that your designation doesn’t stop you from being capable hyung. Of course I’m going to fight for you, that disgusting alpha is taking advantage of you, hurting you. Why wouldn’t you tell me, any of us?” Jaehyun asked and Taeyong pushed his chest. 

“It’s none of your business what I do in my spare time Jaehyun. I asked for him to do it. I like it when he hurts me. I get off on it. He’s not taking advantage of me, because I like it, and I want him to do it,” Taeyong spilled and Jaehyun stared at the shorter omega in front of him.

Taeyong was seeking out someone to hurt him sexually?

“Hyung, being with a manager like that is risky. Dating outside of the pack- why didn’t you come to me?” Jaehyun asked, before feeling like a creep for asking. 

“I want an  _ alpha _ to do that with me. You’re just a beta, you can’t- you can’t knot me, you can’t do that for me,” Taeyong hissed and Jaehyun felt his chest deflate.

“Oh-” Jaehyun whispered.

It wasn’t like Taeyong didn’t know about the way Jaehyun felt about him. He’d always say things like he could see the two of them together, always with the caveat of ‘if he were an alpha’ so Jaehyun worked harder. He exercised more, made himself bigger, in hopes that Taeyong would notice, would see that he could be as big as an alpha, that he could hold him like an alpha, that he could pay attention to him, and protect him like he wanted an alpha to.

He never seemed to see it.

“Jaehyun, don’t be mad at me, I just- I’m sorry,” Taeyong said, reaching out for the beta, who took a step back. 

“I’m not mad. I get it hyung. Just be careful. You don’t need another scandal, I don’t think your image can recover a second time,” Jaehyun said, before turning on his heels. What he’d said had been true, but he didn’t know why it felt so raw to say it. 

“Jaehyun-ah,” Taeyong called after him but Jaehyun just walked to his room, closing the door behind him.

“Hyung?” Haechan asked and Jaehyun dropped onto his bed, putting his head in his hands. 

“Why did I have to be born a beta?” Jaehyun breathed out, wishing that he had been an alpha, been something better than this bland existence, been enough for Taeyong. 

“I ask that all the time,” Donghyuck spoke sincerely and Jaehyun opened his arms, the tinier beta climb into bed with him.

They both understood not being enough for the person they loved, and not being the right designation.


	2. Change

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Donhyuck wants to change

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are hints of sexual situations between Donghyuck and Jaehyun, and they actually initiate a sexual situation. I am aware that Donghyuck was still a minor during this moment in time.

Donghyuck always knew what designation he would grow up to be when he was young. He was always supposed to be a Beta. His parents were Betas, his grandparents were betas, there hadn’t been any omegas or alphas born in the family for decades. 

That didn’t make him wish it were different, that didn’t stop him from dreaming that he could break the curse, that he could be the exception. 

He wasn’t like other kids in his family, like the other betas. He had been softer, smaller, more omega-like. SM had picked up on it, seen it when he was a trainee, and they had forced him on a diet, curtailed his behavior, because they knew he would be a beta too, they assumed that he would and betas couldn’t be soft and cuddly, they couldn’t be one way or the other, but the perfect blend, and Donghyuck was leaning too much to the omega side. 

The band had too many omegas anyway, and they needed to balance it out, Donghyuck couldn’t be anything other than a beta for the band to work. 

So, he presented as a Beta, and he cried, because that wasn’t who he was, but that was who he had to be. 

He’d always felt so strange for it, for knowing that he’d presented wrong, that he wasn’t supposed to be a beta. He knew in his head that he was an omega. The Donghyuck he saw in the mirror was an omega, the Donghyuck he saw in the future was an omega, but he was trapped by his scent, and designation. He knew that it meant something when he was hurt that the other omegas wouldn’t nest with him, that they saw him as a threat, and not someone who belonged to them.

He wasn’t sure if anyone else knew what he was talking about, if others felt that way, and any time he brought it up to Mark, it was thought of as a joke, or that he didn’t appreciate his designation, that there was something wrong with him.

It hurt to be talked to like that from his best friend, the person that he had admittedly fallen for, even though the other boy didn’t love him back. Donghyuck couldn’t help to wonder if that were the reason that Mark wouldn’t love him-- because he couldn’t be an omega. 

He felt alone.

Until he began to room with Jaehyun hyung. 

Hyung understood what Donghyuck felt, he didn’t shun the boy for not being comfortable with his designation, because he was the same way. 

Donghyuck could admit it when he looked at the older boy. Sometimes people could be born to the wrong designation, because looking at Jaehyun, that was an alpha. His shoulders were broad, his body fit, and he was tall. Sure he wasn’t as big as the only other alpha in the band, Johnny hyung, but he seemed to be just as alpha-like as the older male. 

It was nice to be able to talk to someone who understood, and to not feel like he was wrong, that he was sick because he knew that his brain was an omega. They had other similarities as well. They both were in love with people who would never love them back.

That wasn’t why Donghyuck was doing this, browsing a shady online site for scent blockers and producers. His want to be an omega had nothing to do with Mark Lee and his aversion to Donghyuck. He wanted to be an omega because his brain was and he’d like it if his body matched. 

He knew that these things were for omegas who had been hurt, whose scents were messed up because of trauma, or defect and he couldn’t stop the shame in his stomach because he belonged to that group-- he was defective. He had previously bought a scent that was hidden under his bed because he was embarrassed to use it. It was an arousal scent, and even though he had no reason to actually use it, he liked the idea. There was nothing like that scent of Jasmine that said that there was an omega nearby. It was the most omega scent there was. 

He wanted that to be his scent, something soft and flowery, like Jasmine and Cherry blossoms. Something to make an alpha fall for him, something that was unmistakingly  _ omega _ . 

His hands hovered over another tab and he bit his lips before clicking on it. 

Biological supplements, also known as bottles full of hormones. They could help, if you were a weak omega who wasn’t producing slick or an alpha who couldn’t produce a knot. If he could get his hands on something like that, it would work, he would be able to be the omega that he knew he was. There was no way that combining the supplements with the scents that he’d been buying wouldn’t make him feel like an omega.

The instructions were all in english, but it wasn’t like he could get anyone else to come and read it for him.

Donghyuck clicked on the order now button, his eyes closed because if he didn’t, he might chicken out.

 

Donghyuck didn’t know how he fell into this arrangement with Jaehyun hyung, but he didn’t want it to stop. He liked being with the older male, and he liked that Jaehyun validated him. 

He never told Donghyuck that he wasn’t omega enough, that he had to be a beta. He let him be himself, be the omega that he wanted to be and in turn Donghyuck gave him what he wanted, he let him be his alpha. 

The arrangement helped him, and every time he pet over his head, kissed him on the cheek, or scented him, Donghyuck felt himself get farther away from Mark and his control. He was falling for the alpha, even though he hadn’t meant to, and he didn’t see what was too bad about it. If it helped him forget about Mark, and helped Jaehyun get over Taeyong hyung, he didn’t see the harm.

“Omega, what are you up to?” He heard and he looked up at the door to see Jaehyun hyung standing in it, his eyes tiny, a smile on his face. 

Donghyuck could feel his cheeks redden. Jaehyun had just gotten home from NCT Night Night, and Donghyuck was supposed to be asleep by now, but instead he was laying in Jaehyun’s bed, hopefully spreading around the artificial scent that he’d been wearing lately. He hadn’t actually been able to get to sleep anyway, his stomach in knots.

This was one of the last times he’d get to do this, be an omega in his alpha’s bed, for a while, because he and Mark would be moving back into the dream dorm for a comeback soon, Mark’s last comeback with them, so he wouldn’t get to be omega donghyuck until he came back for a 127 comeback. He’d have to go back to the peppermint and rosemary scent that everyone was used to smelling from him. 

“Waiting for you alpha, couldn’t sleep without you,” Donghyuck whispered and Jaehyun took his shirt off, throwing it into the corner before going to his dresser.

Donghyuck watched as he sprayed himself with an alpha scent, something that Donghyuck had gotten him for his birthday. It fit him, masking the basil in his scent, and emphasizing the camphor that took on a more alpha like tone when paired with the woodsy scent of oak. It was quickly becoming Donghyuck’s favorite scent, and made him dream about what could happen if they could make all of their talks come true, if Jaehyun could claim him, if they could be alpha and omega properly.

Jaehyun locked the door before climbing into the den that he’d built for them, his large hands comforting him. When they were alone like this, it felt real, it was their own safe haven away from the rest of the pack, away from the rest of the world. 

“Alpha,” Donghyuck whispered softly, looking over at the alpha, his heart running a mile a minute. Jaehyun smoothed a hand through Donghyuck’s hair, his nose dropping to his scent gland. 

“You smell so good omega,” He whispered and Donghyuck closed his eyes, grabbing his hand and guiding it to his underwear, even though he felt embarrassed about it.

“Alpha- can you- can you help me please?” Donghyuck whispered. 

He’d been taking biological supplements for a couple of months, and he felt like they were working. 

He felt softer, his scent a little sweeter, and that morning he’d produced slick. He’d gotten so excited that he took a double dose. 

He and Jaehyun hadn’t gone all the way and Donghyuck wanted to. Now that he was more omega-like than ever, he wanted his alpha to mate him before he left. 

“Let me grab some slick,” Jaehyun said, going to stand up. Even though they hadn’t gone all the way, they had done some things, and they had pretended when they could. It was easy to pretend that he could get wet, that the alpha had made him that way.

“Don’t need it, just want you,” He whispered and Jaehyun frowned down at him. 

“What do you mean hyuckie?” He asked and Donghyuck looked up at him shyly. 

“I’m wet,” he admitted, trying to will away the chlorine that was wafting from him.

“My perfect little omega,” Jaehyun whispered, kissing Donghyuck and he smiled as he smelled the small burst of jasmine that exuded from him. 

It was working, the supplements were making him right. 

He kissed down Donghyuck’s chest, pulling away his shirt and leaning his face on his stomach, whispering about the child that would grow within. 

His pulled down Donghyuck’s pants, touching him intimately before looking up at him. 

“I thought you prepped earlier,” Jaehyun asked and he shook his head.

“I didn’t,” He explained and Jaehyun frowned. 

“Why- why would you put lu-”

“It’s me,” Donghyuck spoke and he watched as the words processed through Jaehyun’s mind.

“You produced slick?” He asked and Donghyuck nodded.

“Yes, take me alpha, please,” He begged and Jaehyun bit his lip.

“It’s not enough hyuckie, let me get the lube,” Jaehyung said and Donghyuck grabbed his shoulders, pulling him up his bodies. 

“No, I’ll produce more, just, just touch me and it’ll start, just mate with me,” Donghyuck whispered and Jaehyun pulled away.

“It’ll hurt you, I can’t-” He said and Donghyuck pushed at his shoulders. 

“What kind of alpha are you? Why won’t you take me!” He yelled and Jaehyun clapped a hand over Donghyuck’s mouth. 

“Hyuckie  _ please _ ,” He said, his eyes moving to the wall next to him and Donghyuck couldn’t stop thinking about the alpha and omega next door, the ones they were emulating, but couldn’t get right. 

“You don’t want Taeyong to hear you? You don’t want him to know you aren’t alpha enough?” Donghyuck asked as he pried his hand off of his mouth.

“Don’t say that,” Jaehyun hissed through his teeth, his anger welling up, tainting the room with a burning scent. His scent wasn’t as charred as most alphas, the burning more like a campfire, but still fragrant.

Donghyuck was sensitive right now, he knew it was the supplements mixed with the hazy feeling of rejection and shame, because his alpha didn’t want him, he wasn’t omega enough, and his heart wouldn’t slow down.

“I can produce more, I swear, please just- please,” Donghyuck begged, his eyes feeling weak with tears and Jaehyun shook his head. 

“I don’t want to do this tonight, can we just go to bed?” Jaehyun whispered, his tone more distant than it had ever been before, and Donghyuck felt his stomach lurch. 

He didn’t want them to fight, he just wanted him to acknowledge that Donghyuck was a good omega. 

He just wanted to be a good omega.

“Normal omegas don’t have to use lube hyung, let me be normal,” Donghyuck whispered and Jaehyun pulled back up Donghyuck’s pants.

“Donghyuck, please, let’s go to bed,” Jaehyun spoke, his voice tired. 

Jaehyun got off of the bed, moving to get changed and Donghyuck got up, following after him.

“No, please alpha, i’m sorry, let me make it up to you,” Donghyuck begged and everything tilted as all of the blood rushed to his head. 

“Donghyuck what are you- your nose is bleeding,” Jaehyun said and he put his hand under his nose, touching the wetness there.

His eyes rolled back into his head and his mind lost gravity as he blacked out.


	3. Real

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaehyun wants to help Donghyuck.

Jaehyun stared down at Donghyuck as the teen landed in his arms. He kneeled on the ground to stop him from hanging in the air listlessly.

He didn’t know what to do, and no matter how alphaly he thought he was, he was in way over his head. 

What the fuck was he doing to this poor confused boy?

“Hyuckie, hyuckie come on, wake up,” Jaehyun whispered, slapping the pseudo-omega’s face softly. 

His nose was still bleeding profusely, and he grabbed the shirt that had been discarded to wipe his nose. 

“Omega, please,” Jaehyun begged and he watched his eyes flutter before opening. 

“What’s- what’s going on?” He whispered and Jaehyun stared down at him, looking at his tear stained face.

“You’re bleeding,” Jaehyun spoke emphatically. 

He wasn’t sure what to do. 

He wanted to be alpha enough to take care of this, but his beta instincts were kicking in, telling him there was an injured omega that needed help, help that he couldn’t provide. He needed to get an alpha, or another omega, he needed to get help. 

He tried to push it down, because that wasn’t him, he was alpha enough, no matter what Taeyong said, no matter what Donghyuck said. 

“I’m sorry, I guess I got too excited,” Donghyuck said, trying to make a joke of the blood still running down his face, staining his golden skin red. 

His scent was wonky, smelling artificial and wrong, the jasmine too heavy, the cherry blossoms mixing miserably with the peppermint and rosemary. He could smell the pain especially, and he didn’t know where it was coming from, but he just wanted it to stop. 

“It’s not funny, what happened?” He asked the omega, who shook his head, trying to sit up. 

He watched as his eyes began to glaze over again and go distant, like he might pass out again. 

“Lay back, lay back,” Jaehyun scolded and Donghyuck did as he said, tilting his head, submitting to him. 

“Stop,” He whispered and he looked up at him with round doe eyes.

“I’m sorry I scared you alpha, I didn’t mean to. I’m sorry I ruined our whole night,” He whispered, before looking away, his hand coming up to cover Jaehyun’s, who was still dabbing at the blood that had seemed to slow. 

“Thank you for taking such good care of me alpha,” He whispered and Jaehyun knew that he should be trying to get to the bottom of this, but he was tired, and he felt oddly proud that Donghyuck had still put his faith in him, believed in his alpha when he couldn’t.

“Come on, let’s get you on the bed, and into something new,” He whispered, getting off of the floor. Donghyuck reached out for him and he picked him up, letting the omega wrap his arms around his neck as he leaned his head against his chest.

Jaehyun put him on the bed before moving to his dresser to grab something that was less blood stained. 

He opened it, pushing aside the spray bottle that he knew Donghyuck used to cover his scent before stopping when he spotted vials that he had never seen before. 

“Hyuckie, what’s this?” Jaehyun asked, turning to look at the younger boy. 

“Nothing, put it back,” He called, getting out of bed faster than he should have been able to. Jaehyun dodged his hands, holding the bottles over his head and squinting at the words.

“Where did you get this?” Jaehyun asked and Donghyuck tried to jump to get it. 

“Nowhere, the internet, just let it go,” Donghyuck said and Jaehyun frowned. 

“This- is this how you-? This shit is dangerous, do you know what they put in this stuff, you can’t take this,” He admonished, opening the vial. 

“What are you doing, stop, what are you doing?” He asked, pushing at him more insistently. 

Jaehyun opened the door, heading to the bathroom and Donghyuck tackled him, making him drop the bottle. 

He watched as it smashed and Donghyuck scrambled off of him, running his hands through the mess and sucking his fingers into his mouth. 

“That was my last bottle, why would you do that?” Donghyuck whimpered and Jaehyun grabbed him, pulling him away even from the pile. 

“Look at your hands- you’re bleeding,” He admonished and Donghyuck pushed him away. 

“You don’t get it!” Donghyuck yelled. 

“I don’t get it? How can you say I don’t get it?” Jaehyun hissed and Donghyuck hugged himself, trying to self soothe. 

He looked pathetic, blood staining his chin, his fingers a sticky purple from the vials and dried tear tracks on his face. 

“You can’t grow a knot, boo hoo. You aren’t enough for Taeyong, boo fucking hoo. You aren’t stuck in this stupid body, that is the most beta that it can be. You are an alpha without a knot. I am a stupid beta who can’t bear children, who can’t get slick, who can’t smell like anything other than a fucking beta. I wake up every morning and wish I’d be different and the one thing that helps, the one thing that will  _ fix _ me, you have to ruin,” He broke down in tears as lights began to flick on.

His scent was weird, pumping out that artificial jasmine again, mixing with distress and metal like gunpowder and Jaehyun took a step closer to him. 

“Hyuckie-”

“No!” He shouted. 

“What’s going on, why is there a strange sce- Donghyuck what happened to your face?” Taeyong said, rushing forward before hissing as he stepped on a piece of glass. 

“What is this on the floor- are these hormones, who the fuck is taking hormones,” Taeyong asked and Jaehyun raced forward as Donghyuck fell to his knees, his fists locking under his ribcage as he began to vomit.

“Why is he taking hormones? Why does he smell like that?” Taeyong asked, and he heard more doors open, more lights turn on as Donghyuck continued to throw up, the purple of the hormones giving way to something brown and nasty, like coffee grinds.

He was throwing up blood.

“Is that- we’ve got to call someone, Taeil hyung call an ambulance. What the fuck was he doing taking omega hormones?” Taeyong asked.

“He was taking omega hormones?” Mark asked and Donghyuck clung even closer to Jaehyun, taking a deep breath as he stopped vomiting.

“Alpha please,” He whimpered.

“Did he just call you alpha?” Taeyong turned an accusatorial eye on him and he clenched his jaw.

He knew what this was starting to look like, he knew they were thinking that Jaehyun had hurt him, but he couldn't explain to them just how wrong they were.

“What the hell is going on?” Taeyong asked as Donghyuck slumped into Jaehyun’s side. 

“We should get him to the doctor,” Jaehyun urged.

“They’re on their way,” Taeil called and Taeyong looked over at him.

“He’s been-” Mark began. 

“Mark shut up!” Donghyuck called before leaning back over and vomiting again.

“Someone tell me what the fuck is going on, now,” Taeyong said and if it were possible for an omega to alpha command someone, he knew that this would have been it. 

“Donghyuck has been pretending to be an omega, and he’s been sleeping with Jaehyun hyung, playing alpha and omega with him,” Mark divulged and Donghyuck pushed his hair out of his face, the pain and betrayal twisting it into something cruel.

“I hate you Mark. I fucking hate you,” He spat out miserably. 

“Is this true?” Taeyong asked and there was knocking on the door. 

“That’s the paramedics,” Taeil called. 

Winwin went to open the door, and he could hear them on the stairs, coming to get Donghyuck.

The paramedics made it down, putting him on a stretcher. 

“Alpha,” Donghyuck called as they took him away. Jaehyun tried to follow after and Taeyong pushed him back, his finger on his phone, ready to call someone.

“Don’t. You’ve done enough. We need a real alpha,” Taeyong hissed, pushing him away and he watched as they took Donghyuck away, wondering if Taeyong was right.


	4. Sorry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaehyun visits Donghyuck in the hospital

Jaehyun stood outside of the hospital room, watching as most of the younger omegas squeezed into Donghyuck’s bed. Renjun was curled up in front of him, Chenle was on the foot of the bed, Jungwoo was in the back, and Doyoung was curled up behind him. They were running their hands through his hair, petting over his limbs, soothing him while they whispered soft things that had nothing to do with why he was in the hospital. He was glad they could do that for him, take his mind off of his injuries.

Jaehyun felt for the boy, He wouldn’t get a respite from his schedules, and no one knew exactly what they were going to tell Lee Soo Man about what was going on. He had no idea what they were going to do. Jaehyun had to come in earlier that morning, Johnny bringing him over with ten, Jungwoo, Lucas, and the dream kids. He hadn’t told them what happened to the boy, but the omegas found out once they got to the hospital and hadn’t left Donghyuck’s side since. 

Jaehyun knocked on the door and Renjun looked up at him, cutting him down with a glare. 

“Don’t you have somewhere else to be,  _ alpha _ ?” The small omega said and Jaehyun flinched at his tone. 

“Yah, don’t talk to your hyung like that,” Jaehyun admonished, because he had nothing else to say. 

“Don’t you have somewhere else to be,  _ alpha _ ?” Doyoung asked, daring Jaehyun to say something to him and Jaehyun clenched his teeth.

“Can I speak to him, alone?” Jaehyun asked and he heard someone scoff from the pile. 

“Please,” He begged when no one budged. 

“Guys, come on, let’s give them a second to chat,” Jungwoo suggested and they turned to look at him funny. 

“I’m sure we can give him a couple of minutes. They’ll be fine, and we can go find some iced choco for him,” Jungwoo urged in his quiet voice and they all disengaged from Donghyuck, filing past him out of the small hospital room. Renjun slammed his shoulder into him rather hard on their way out. 

“They were nesting me,” Donghyuck whispered as Jaehyun closed the door softly behind them before coming to sit down next to him. 

“I know, that’s good,” Jaehyun said, picking at his fingers and feeling useless. 

What was he supposed to do?

“How are you feeling?” Jaehyun asked, and Donghyuck shrugged. 

“Stupid, mostly,” He whispered. Jaehyun reached his hand out, intertwining it with the pseudo-omegas. 

“Don’t- what you did was dangerous, and really stupid, but you’re not stupid. It’s my fault, I shouldn’t have-” Jaehyun cut himself off. 

He didn’t know how to apologize to the boy. 

He knew what he should do, what he should say. 

But he was afraid to, afraid to utter those words. 

He wasn’t ready to let go of the fantasy quite yet. 

“It wasn’t your fault alpha, it was me, I should have been content with the scent blockers, I shouldn’t have taken so much. I’m sorry” Donghyuck whispered, his grip tight on Jaehyun’s hand. 

“Don’t apologize. Look Donghyuck, I-”

“Don’t say it,” Donghyuck whispered and Jaehyun let his eyes travel up the kids face. His face was paler than usual, and he had an IV in his arm. 

“What are they giving you?” He asked, changing the subject, because he wasn’t sure he could talk about it just yet.

“I’m dehydrated,” He explained, his eyes flicking to the hospital equipment. 

“Are you still bleeding?” He asked and Donghyuck shook his head. 

“No, it was small, the wound clotted, it wasn’t as bad as it looked. They said my scent will be back to normal soon,” He explained, running his hands through his hair. 

“Did you tell them? Did you tell the doctors why you were taking the hormones?” He asked and Donghyuck nodded. 

“They told me there were ways to deal with designation dysmorphia, that I could take medicine for it,” He whispered quietly.

“But?” He asked. 

There had to be a but involved.

“But Lee Soo Man has to approve of the change first,” He explained and Jaehyun watched as donghyuck bit down on his lip. 

“But until I can get the treatments legally, the other omegas have agreed to let me nest with them, and stuff,” He whispered and Jaehyun smiled.

He was happy about that. At least Donghyuck would get to be recognized by the other omegas. 

“We have to break up, don’t we?” Donghyuck whispered and Jaehyun clenched his teeth.

He didn’t want to acknowledge this, but he knew it was coming. 

“Yes,” Jaehyun whispered and Donghyuck shot forward quickly, wrapping his arms around Jaehyun’s middle. He buried his face in Jaehyun’s side and he could feel the tears wetting his shirt.  He hugged him back awkwardly, running his hands through his hair. 

“I don’t want to,” Donghyuck whispered and Jaehyun took a deep breath, taking in the waning scent of omega distress that was heavily distorted. 

He leaned forward, burying his face in Donghyuck’s hair as the boy cried beneath him. 

“I’m sorry, hyuckie I’m so sorry. I can’t. I can’t do this anymore, I can’t hurt you anymore. We both have a lot to work out, and we can’t do it like this,” He whispered and Donghyuck nodded into his side. 

“Can I still be your omega?” He asked, looking up at Jaehyun. Jaehyun wiped away his tears with his thumb.

“You’re my favorite omega,” He whispered and Donghyuck smiled softly.

“Now I know you’re lying, I’m no one’s favorite,” He whispered. 

“You’re my favorite, always,” Jaehyun whispered and Donghyuck wiped his face, leaning forward to put his forehead on Jaehyun’s shoulder. 

“Thank you for letting me be an omega when no one else would,” He whispered and Jaehyun wanted to hug him even closer, wanted to pull him into his side and never let him go. 

“Are you done?” He heard and he turned around to see Mark standing at the door, his face in a scowl. 

“Yeah, what’s up?” He asked, feeling the heat of his glare. He could smell chlorine wafting off of Donghyuck and he was sure Mark could pick up on it. 

“Taeyong hyung wants to talk to you,” Mark said and Jaehyun nodded, leaving Donghyuck with a kiss on his forehead before walking out of the door. 

“What you’re doing is sick,” Mark said and Jaehyun turned around to look at him. 

“What?” He asked and mark cleared his throat. 

“You heard me. It’s sick that you’re encouraging him to hurt himself, that you’re stringing him along like this,” Mark said and Jaehyun grabbed his collar, pushing him against the wall. 

He was tired, and he hadn’t had any sleep since the day before. He couldn’t take Mark poking his nose in this right now. 

“You don’t know anything about what was going on between me and Donghyuck,” He hissed in the younger beta’s face. 

“At least I told him I didn’t love him,” Mark accused.

“Hey, what’s going on here?” He heard and he dropped the kid’s collar. 

“Nothing,” Mark said, pushing past Jaehyun and heading back towards where the rest of the members were. Taeyong was standing in the middle of the hallway, his arms crossed at his chest. 

“Oh look at you, big bad alpha, pushing around kids, then again, that’s not all you do with them, right?” Taeyong accused and Jaehyun grit his teeth. 

“I’m not doing this with you right now, Taeyong. Donghyuck is sick, this isn’t the right time to do this” Jaehyun said and the omega grabbed his arm, pushing him into the wall. 

“Yes you are! Do you have any idea what could have happened, what that shit could have done to him. You could have killed him. You’re the reason he’s here, and all for what? So you can play alpha and omega, so you could-” 

“Replace you?” Jaehyun interrupted. 

“Yes,” Taeyong bit out and Jaehyun knocked his arms away, pushing him into the wall across from him. 

“Of course you think that I did it to replace you. Lee Taeyong can’t fathom a world where everything isn’t centered around him. Never mind the fact that Donghyuck has been struggling with this since he presented, since he cried in your arms that night and you did nothing to help him. Never mind he hasn’t felt like himself in a long time, that all he wanted was to not feel so alone. Never mind the fact that I never actually fucked him, because to you, it doesn’t matter. I just want to get into another omega because the experience of fucking you was so good that I wanted to mentally and emotionally fuck up an eighteen year old. Not all of us are masochists Taeyong, not all of us need to be degraded to bust a nut. I cared about him, when no one else did, and he listened to me when I was at the end of my rope. So no, this had absolutely nothing to do with you and me. This was me and Donghyuck. I never even thought about you for a second when I was with him. I thought about him, because I can emotionally invest in someone, because when I am with someone, I am  _ with _ them only. I’m not thinking about anyone else, especially not someone like you,” Jaehyun finally let out before pushing his hands through his hair. He backed away from Taeyong, giving them space. He watched the omega’s chest heave and he waited to feel something. He didn’t.

“It was all true- you weren’t forcing him to change himself?” He asked after regarding the younger man for a second and Jaehyun shook his head. 

“I never wanted him to do that to himself, not like this. I just want him to be happy, like I want everyone to be. Being an omega makes him happy,” Jaehyun breathed out, wiping over his face. 

He could see the strange looks doctors were giving them and he felt embarrassed. 

He didn’t even want to talk about it anymore.

He just wanted to get out of there. 

“Jaehyun, I’m sorry,” Taeyong apologized softly and Jaehyun shook his head as he turned away, walking to the elevator. 

He didn’t want sorry any more.


	5. Done

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Donghyuck faces Jaehyun alone for the first time.

Donghyuck cleared his throat, stepping into the room. 

He hadn’t been back to the room since that night that everything went down. 

He’d seen Jaehyun of course, but they hadn’t been that close while they’d been traveling around for promotions, and getting ready for his latest comeback with dream. 

But now, Donghyuck was back in the dorm, and beginning to gear up promotions with 127. There wasn’t going to be much down time before they started to promote with 127, and even though Donghyuck was tired, he’d have to practice. 

Donghyuck placed his bag down on his bed, moving his clothes out of his duffel bag and back into his drawers. He put his bag in the closet before remaking his bed with the blankets that he’d used in the dream dorm. 

It smelled like him- the new him, the him he knew he was. 

It had been nice being with the dream members. He’d sat down with the rest of Dream that weren’t there the day that he had to go to the hospital, and he’d told them that he was an omega, that he was going to change his designation, and that he was happier that way. They’d been supportive, and even though Jisung had some rather intrusive questions about what that would pertain, he felt happy.

He’d talked with Lee Soo man, and the man had allowed him to begin to transition. Quietly of course, he’d take scent blockers, and new scent producers. He didn’t want people to know that Donghyuck had designation dysmorphia, instead that it was a similar situation as Taeyong, that he was originally an omega, but that he was an omega who was pretending to be a beta for health, or safety reasons. That way, no one could be angry about him identifying as an omega now. He wanted to tell the world, but he knew what would happen if people knew. They would treat him as a sick beta instead of the omega that he was. He liked who he was now.  His new scent was Jasmine and Cherry blossoms. He liked his scent, liked that his body was producing it now, and that he was feeling more like an omega everyday. 

There was a knock on the door and Donghyuck turned to see Jaehyun leaning against the door, his hands jammed deep into his pockets. 

“Alpha,” Donghyuck spoke brightly, smiling up at the man. Jaehyun rubbed the back of his neck, giving him a dimpled smile. 

Donghyuck tried to squash the thumping of his heart. 

He wasn’t successful.

“Omega, you look nice, and happy. You smell really good,” Jaehyun complimented and Donghyuck blushed.

He liked that he was being acknowledged for who he truly was, he liked being complimented for being desirable, for things that made him feel even more like an omega.

“The new scent fits you,” He said and Donghyuck shrugged.

“Thank you. It’s the same as before,” Donghyuck said and Jaehyun closed the door behind him, stepping even further into the room.

“It’s different now, less artificial, more Donghyuck,” Jaehyun said and Donghyuck smiled softly, pushing his hands through his bangs. 

Jaehyun sat down on his bed and Donghyuck watched the alpha get comfortable. 

“How did the dreamies react?” Jaehyun asked and Donghyuck sat down on his bed, across from him.

With everything that happened between him and Jaehyun, it took a lot not to crawl over onto the bed with him, and snuggle under his arm. 

Donghyuck slipped his hands between his own thighs, pulling his shoulders inwards to make him look smaller. 

He’d been doing it for a while, something he’d started before he’d began to transition. 

“Mark apologized, told me he was sorry for the way he treated me, for being so mean. He tried to apologize for telling about you know- us, but I don’t- I don’t blame him. I get why he did it,” Donghyuck admitted, his eyes dropping to his knees.

“I know how it looked, how bad it seemed to be calling someone alpha like that, someone older, especially because they didn’t- they don’t know what it’s like to be like we are,” Donghyuck admitted and he felt a warm hand on his thigh. 

“I’m sorry about that, about-” Jaehyun began and Donghyuck shook his head. 

“it’s not your fault, you did nothing wrong,” Donghyuck spoke softly. 

“Nothing but love you,” Jaehyun said and Donghyuck finally looked up at the man. 

“You loved me?” Donghyuck asked and Jaehyun nodded.

“Of course, why wouldn’t I love you?” Jaehyun asked and Donghyuck shrugged.

“I’m not very loveable,” Donghyuck said and Jaehyun reached his arms out.

Donghyuck found himself crawling into his arms and Jaehyun slid so that he was fully on the bed and that he was cradling the young omega. 

“You are very loveable,” Jaehyun assured him and Donghyuck closed his eyes. 

“Even now?” Donghyuck asked and Jaehyun nodded.

“Even now.” 

Donghyuck turned in his arms, leaning forward to place his lips on his. 

Jaehyun rubbed his hands over Donghyuck’s back. Donghyuck straddled the Alpha’s lap, his hands scratching at Jaehyun’s shoulders, his hands trying to hold onto the alpha as much as he could.

Donghyuck felt his face heat up as he began to smell his own scent blossom, the jasmine filling the room.

He pulled back as Jaehyun scented the air before leaning his forehead against Donghyuck’s. 

“We’re not supposed to do this, we’re supposed to have broken up,” Jaehyun breathed, and Donghyuck closed his eyes. 

“We are,” Donghyuck whispered. He felt Jaehyun’s hand on his neck, soft and comforting. 

Donghyuck leaned his head down against Jaehyun’s shoulder. 

“I’m working on myself, being happy in who I am. I’m not doing it to be with you, but for me,” Donghyuck admitted and Jaehyun squeezed him softly. 

“I know, I saw you during promotions, you looked so happy,” Jaehyun whispered and he nodded. 

“Being an omega makes me happy, I’m happy, and I know that we shouldn’t, but I’m not done loving you, not yet,” Donghyuck whispered and Jaehyun just held him closer. 

“I’m not done loving you either,” Jaehyun whispered, kissing Donghyuck’s head. Donghyuck smiled, his eyes falling shut.

They weren’t done yet.

  
  



	6. Enough

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Donghyuck goes into heat and Jaehyun wonders if he is good enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... Donghyuck is going through heat in this one... the sex isn't explicit, but it's there. In this universe, it is discussed that it is possible to come down from heat without a knot, but it's not really explained how, because most of the time sex is involved, and those who are having sex either have a knot, or an artificial knot to help them through. However, scenting is something that can help one come down, especially if they feel like they are in a safe space, so that is why Donghyuck doesn't need a know to come down.

Donghyuck leaned against the wall, wiping the sweat off of his forehead.

He'd been feeling awful for most of the day. He figured he'd been coming down with something, but he figured he'd have to just work through it.

He'd been irritable and snappy with Renjun and Chenle this morning, to the point of making Chenle cry.

Of course, Renjun got on him about it, until he cried, but while Chenle had let it go, Donghyuck was still in a sour mood, which seemed to be exacerbated by his mystery illness. 

“Come on Donghyuck, come get some water,” Renjun called from across the room. Since Mark left, Renjun had taken the unofficial role as leader, even though Dream wasn't supposed to have a leader.

Donghyuck sighed, pushing off of the wall and trudging to the other side of the dance studio where Renjun was passing out water bottles.

“You okay?” Renjun asked, reaching out to touch his forehead and Donghyuck nodded, taking the bottle and pressing it against his aching head. 

He wasn't sure why, but the actual smell of Renjun’s Black cherry scent smelled too bitter. It served to do little more than piss him off even more.

“‘M fine. My stomach hurts is all,” Donghyuck confessed and Renjun reached forward to pet over him. He dodged the touch.

“How long have you been feeling like this?” Renjun asked and he shrugged.

“Three or four days,” Donghyuck answered and Renjun raised his eyebrow.

“Is it your hormones? I know sometimes people develop allergies to those things. Should I call Taeyong Hyung?” Renjun asked, his voice low as he looked around the dance studio, as if trying to avoid eavesdropping ears. The staff that worked with them closely knew about Donghyuck’s condition, but not everyone knew. 

“No, it's not my hormones,” Donghyuck said, even though he couldn't be sure that it wasn't. He'd heard of people becoming sick from changing their scent, but he hadn't really known anyone who had designation dysmorphia and had changed their scent. He couldn't go back to smelling like a beta- to being a beta, so it couldn't be that.

It had to be something else.

He was probably just coming down with something else.

“Should I call Taeyong Hyung anyway?” He asked and Donghyuck couldn't stop the revulsion that shook through him at the thought of Taeyong coming to get him, of the omega taking care of him. Taeyong still referred to him as Haechan- even though he told the band that he preferred Donghyuck, because Haechan was his stage name, the name of the beta that he’d pretended to be, a mediator, a sunshine for the band the way Betas were supposed to be, but he was his true self now, the Omega that Donghyuck had always been. He didn’t like that about Taeyong, that and the way he looked at Jaehyun nowadays.

“No. Definitely not,” He nearly shouted.

“I bet he wants Jaehyun hyung,” Jisung called and he bit his lip.

Having the alpha hold him in his arms and comfort him did sound pretty good at the time.

“Shut up Jisung,” Donghyuck yelled at the young alpha and Jisung got into his face teasingly.

“What are you going to do? Tell Jaehyun?” He teased, pushing his shoulder, imposing his height over Donghyuck and he felt his knees lock up as his head tilted backwards and his eyes closed. He could feel an embarrassing dribble of slick slide down his leg. 

“Holy shit,” Jisung murmured. He slid his fingers across Donghyuck’s forehead.

“Alpha,” Donghyuck whined out.

“Holy shit,” Jisung repeated and the touch was ripped away. 

Donghyuck's eyes snapped open.

“Jisungie,” Chenle hissed meaningfully, his hand holding Jisung’s wrist. Jisung took a step back, his eyes never leaving Donghyuck.

“Donghyuck, we gotta get you home to the 127 dorm,” Renjun said carefully.

“Why? What's wrong with him,” Jeno asked and Donghyuck wrapped his arms around himself in order to give himself some semblance of comfort.

His stomach was starting to hurt the worst it had since he'd started to feel sick.

“Donghyuck, whats wrong?” Jaemin asked, and he doubled over as Jaemin touched his arm.

“Don't touch him,” Renjun yelled at Jaemin who took his arm away.

“It's an omega thing, something that he needs to get taken care of at home, I'll tell staff that we need to go home. Chenle, can you…” Renjun trailed out and Chenle wrapped his arms around Donghyuck.

Renjun went to talk with the staff before coming back, piling onto Donghyuck. He tried to weakly push them off, but gave in to let them scent him, even if they weren't who he wanted.

They were dismissed, and piled into two separate company cars, the omegas in one, and the others in another. Renjun slung his arm around his shoulders. 

“So when were you going to tell us?” Renjun asked and Donghyuck frowned up at him. He didn't know what he was asking.

“What are you talking about?” Donghyuck asked and Renjun shook his head.

“You're in heat hyuckie,” Renjun explained softly and Donghyuck’s eyes widened as he realized what that meant, and what them knowing that meant.

“You can't- you can't tell Mark. He'll be so mad. You can't tell,” Donghyuck begged and Renjun shook his head.

“I won't tell.”

Donghyuck didn't know why he didn't want the beta to know. Maybe he was afraid of confirming Mark’s suspicions. Maybe it was because he and Jaehyun weren't supposed to be doing this anymore. He really liked where he was with Jaehyun, and anyone else knowing just how far they’d gone scared him.

They arrived at the dorm and the other two omegas helped him up to his room.

“I want alpha,” Donghyuck whimpered and Renjun held him tightly, running his hands through his sweaty hair soothingly.

“I know, he’ll be here soon. Take a shower and relax until then,” Renjun whispered.

Donghyuck was dumped onto his bed by the other two Omegas, who waved before leaving. They didn't stay, because they had no idea what to do to help. He didn't blame them, he didn't know what to do either. Donghyuck shrugged off his shirt and pants, trying to cool down. It was a lot hotter than it had been before the others had left. He went to shower, pulling on fresh boxers before dropping back onto his bed.

He groaned, getting off of his bed, feeling listless, before laying in the bed beside of his. He shifted and the stale scent of camphor and basil drifted from the sheets. Donghyuck felt another dribble of slick slide down his leg and he buried his face in the pillow, hugging it close his face desperately trying to keep the scent in his nostrils. Even though he’d showered, he still felt gross and sweaty.

“Omega?” He heard and he opened his eyes, squinting up at the alpha standing in the doorway. He'd fallen into a restless and feverish sleep, waiting for some relief.

“I’m in heat.” Donghyuck whimpered miserably and Jaehyun sat down on the bed beside Donghyuck.

“I know, Renjun told me. Does it hurt?” He asked and Donghyuck nodded.

“My stomach hurts, and everything is too hot and I'm so wet,” Donghyuck complained and Jaehyun took in a sharp breath. His boxers were beginning to get tacky, sticking to his thighs, and having Jaehyun so close but not touching him didn’t help the situation in the least bit.

“Can you help me alpha?” Donghyuck asked and Jaehyun nodded, climbing further onto the bed, hovering over the younger.

He brushed his hands over Donghyuck's thighs before leaning up to kiss his forehead.

“How do you want me to help you?” Jaehyun asked and Donghyuck submitted to him.

“I need you in me ,” Donghyuck whispered and the alpha nodded above him.

Donghyuck watched with flushed cheeks as the older peeled off his underwear.

“Do I need lube?” Donghyuck asked quietly and Jaehyun shook his head, kissing his knees as he lifted them.

“You're perfect hyuck-ah,” he breathed.

Donghyuck had had issues with producing slick. He knew that the hormones that he'd been taking made it possible, but because it was a certain dose, things like that would take longer. He was more understanding, and they'd started to use lube that was specially formulated to mimic slick. It was easier now for him, and he didn't equate producing slick with being an omega like he once had.

Jaehyun pushed into him and he brought his attention back to the alpha who was staring down at him with such adoration and admiration. Jaehyun moved above him, his voice soft as he whispered how much he loved Donghyuck, how beautiful he was, what an amazing omega he was.

Donghyuck lost himself to the haze, much like he had the first time they'd made love.

“I can't,” Jaehyun whimpered and Donghyuck opened his eyes, looking over at him.

“Hyung?” He whispered and Jaehyun buried his head in his shoulder.

“I can't knot you,” he whispered, his hips stuttering against Donghyuck's. He sounded so pained and frantic. Donghyuck couldn't understand why.

“Where is your heat kit? Do you have an artificial knot?” Jaehyun asked, his voice tight. Donghyuck shook his head. No one knew he was sexually active, and he didn't even think he was capable of having a heat. There was no way SM would give him a heat kit, and if they found out he needed one, he didn’t know what they would do.

“I don't have one,” Donghyuck panted and Jaehyun’s hips pushed deeper as he stilled, curses falling from his lips in frustration.

“I'm sorry. I'm sorry I'm not enough,” Jaehyun whispered into his neck, his hands rubbing over Donghyuck's arms and shoulders tenderly. He was pressing his scent into him, melding it with the omega’s. Donghyuck felt like Jaehyun was taking care of him, felt like he was the most important thing in his life. 

He felt like he was worth it, that he was enough.

He felt something unravel in his stomach as the heat peaked before dissipating.

He dropped back on the bed, his hair flopping into his eyes.

“Is it done?” Donghyuck whispered, his voice hoarse and Jaehyun kissed his shoulder.

“I think so, are you okay? Does anything hurt?” He asked and Donghyuck shook his head.

“How did you- I didn't knot you,” Jaehyun asked and Donghyuck shrugged.

He didn't know how knotting or heats worked in general, but he was glad that he'd spent it with Jaehyun. He couldn't help but think that Jaehyun was the only alpha he'd ever want to spend his heats with.

“I'm tired alpha,” he whispered and Jaehyun rolled so that he was only laying halfway on top of him, caging him in with his arms.

“We should clean up,” Jaehyun whispered and Donghyuck shook his head.

He didn't know how to explain that he kind of wanted to keep his seed, his scent inside of him, that he wanted to keep all of him forever.

“Later,” he whispered, his voice quiet and Jaehyun held him tighter.

He turned in his arms, so that his back was pressed into Jaehyun’s strong chest.

Jaehyun brought the blanket up to his chest, covering the both of them.

“Tomorrow morning, we're going to set up an appointment to make sure everything is okay with you. See what else the hormones affect,” he whispered and Donghyuck nodded. Jaehyun kissed the tip of his spine and Donghyuck closed his eyes, letting his mind wander to his future and the foolish want that was bubbling in his chest.

“You’re enough, you’ll always be enough for me,” He murmured to Jaehyun as his eyes closed and he drifted off.


	7. Forever

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Donghyuck wants Jaehyun Forever

Once the thought was in his mind, Donghyuck couldn’t stop thinking about it. 

It was there everywhere he went, everything he did with Jaehyun. 

It was there when they were backstage waiting for a performance, and Jaehyun would sling an arm around his shoulder, when they had dinner, and he’d help serve his meal, when he would come home from NCT Night Night and Donghyuck would be laying in his bed, waiting up for him. Jaehyun would give him a soft smile as he closed the door behind him, and admonish him, tell him that he should be sleeping because his day was too early for him to wait up and the thought would light up his mind like a switchboard.

He thought about it every time Jaehyun whispered his name, every time he called him  _ his omega _ .

His heart would thump in his chest and he would find the words on the tip of his tongue, trapped right behind his teeth, his heart leaping into his throat to try and help push it out.

But instead, he would fall silent, blush and hide in whatever he could, make himself smaller. 

He knew that he was young, he was barely legal, he’d already been giving so much leeway from his company, afforded things that would have sunk better artists. Given the scandal with another mated couple that tried to mate earlier in the year, and how his hyungs had to hide their relationships, their child, it wasn’t something that he had the confidence to do. 

So, he pushed it aside, tried to ignore the way his stomach fluttered, tried to stop the way his mind would run wild with the fantasies of him and Jaehyun, tried not to think that the longer they stayed the way they were, the bigger the chance that it wouldn’t last. 

They could be pulled apart, Jaehyun could find someone else, he could fall back in love with Taeyong, and Donghyuck wouldn’t fault him. 

He could give him things that Donghyuck couldn’t, and the way that Taeyong had been icy towards them, maybe his former affections were returned. 

He didn’t want to think about that though, because that hurt too much, and he liked to stay in this feeling, this floating that lifted his heart every time he watched him smile at him, those dimples shining just for him. 

Even if they were transient, he would take whatever he could get. 

 

“Hyuckie,” He heard and he looked up from his phone. 

“Why are you on the floor?” Jaehyun asked and Donghyuck stood up, brushing off his front. 

“Alpha,” He smiled at the older man, who closed the door behind him. 

“I was supposed to be cleaning under your bed, but I forgot,” Donghyuck said and Jaehyun shook his head. 

“You’ve been forgetful lately, what’s on your mind?” He asked and Donghyuck shook his head, sitting on his bed. 

“Nothing,” He said quickly and Jaehyun sat on the bed next to him. 

“You’ve not going into heat right?” He asked and Donghyuck shook his head. 

He couldn’t take suppressants because they messed with his hormones and messed up his scent. He also couldn’t bear children and his heats were milder, so there wasn’t a massive need for the pills. It just meant that he had to monitor his mood and behavior to make sure that it was taken care of quickly so it wouldn’t interfere with promotions. 

They didn’t tell Lee Soo man about the two of them, but he knew that Donghyuck was going through heat. Because of his hormones, they had to mimic older omega’s hormone chemistry, and it was normal for omegas who were taking treatment to have heats, even if they hadn’t done  _ that _ before. 

“I’m fine alpha, really, just tired,” He said and Jaehyun got up to turn the light off.

“Then you should be sleeping, omega,” Jaehyun said, tackling him playfully and maneuvering them so that he was straddling Donghyuck, the blanket above his head. 

Donghyuck let his eyes adjust to the darkness, staring up at Jaehyun’s face above him.

“I’m not tired,” He complained and Jaehyun shook his head. 

“You just told me you were tired,” He pointed out and Donghyuck rolled his eyes. 

“Don’t roll your eyes at me,” Jaehyun warned teasingly and Donghyuck stuck his tongue out at him cutely. 

Jaehyun leaned forward, nuzzling Donghyuck’s neck with his nose and Donghyuck submitted to him with a laugh.

“I love you,” Jaehyun whispered and Donghyuck felt his heart melt. 

“I love you too hyung,” He whispered before closing his eyes, feeling those words knocking against the back of his teeth again, begging to be let out and all of a sudden, Donghyuck felt tired of fighting it. 

Maybe he’d just let them out. 

“I want you to claim me,” Donghyuck breathed and he listened to the silence, dread filling his heart. 

He was wrong, he should have kept it to himself, he shouldn’t have said anything. 

Omegas didn’t propose mating, they didn’t propose the bite. That was an alpha’s job. He shouldn’t have opened his mouth. 

“Say something,” He whispered, his voice even quieter. 

“Hyuckie,” Jaehyun started and Donghyuck swallowed, wishing the words had gone back down his throat where they belonged. 

“It’s- it’s okay if you don’t want that, just tell me,” Donghyuck whispered and Jaehyun rubbed his thumb across Donghyuck’s brow bone. 

“I want that, I want that so much, but I’m not... I’m not an alpha, I won’t be able to claim you the way you want me to. It won’t pull as strong, I won’t be able to feel you through the connection,” Jaehyun admitted, ashamed and he shook his head. 

“You’re my alpha, and that’s all that matters. I want you,” Donghyuck whispered and Jaehyun rolled off of the omega, wrapping him in his arms tightly. 

“It’s forever, if I claim you, we’re it for each other, are you sure you want that?” He asked and Donghyuck nodded, dropping his chin to his chest. 

He wanted Jaehyun forever. 


	8. Effort

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ten tries to make an effort to be there for Donghyuck.

Ten eyed the alpha who was getting undressed in the corner,  pulling off his shirt in the corner. He’d just made his way over from the radio show. They still didn’t get to live together the way that wanted to, as a mated pair. SM wouldn’t even put them in the same unit, which Ten couldn’t figure out why? Did he think they’d fuck on stage or something?

Then again, maybe he thought they’d room together and create another ‘problem’ for the company.

That didn't stop them though, and whenever Johnny could sneak over to Ten's apartment, he did.

“I’m sorry, what did my loving wonderful alpha just say?” Ten said, feigning sweetness and Johnny sighed at the bite in his voice. 

“I said that my wonderful, beautiful, young, talented,  _ sexy _ omega, the father of my child whom I love very much should try to make an effort to be nice to Donghyuck, and that I want to do a couples date with my best friend and his omega, Donghyuck, who I think my loving, breathtaking, sweet, beautiful, no gorgeous mate should get close to,” Johnny repeated and Ten nodded. 

“That’s what I thought you said. Johnny, I am nice to him, I’m nice to everyone,” Ten pointed out and Johnny gave him a look. 

“Okay, mostly everyone,” Ten amended. 

“look, I’m cordial with the boy, I don’t outright insult him to his face,” Ten explained and Johnny changed his pants before crawling onto the bed, laying his head on Ten’s stomach. 

“You’re not nice to him babe. You’re a lot of things, but nice isn’t always it. You’re a bitch babe, and I mean that in the best possible way. It’s just- he needs a lot of guidance,” Johnny explained. 

“Then he can go to Taeyong for that, I’m not the pack omega, remember,” Ten bit out bitterly. 

He didn’t know what it was that felt so unsettling about Johnny being the pack alpha and Taeyong being the pack omega. He knew that nothing would ever happen between them, but it didn’t stop the pestering thoughts of what people expected from Pack alphas and omegas. He knew plenty of omegas and alphas that hadn’t started off as linked before being deemed Pack alpha and Omega, and they all ended up together. It had happened in Bangtan, in Seventeen and so many other groups. 

“You know why he can’t go to Taeyong. He isn’t taking their relationship too well, you know how they feel about each other,” Johnny explained softly and Ten sighed. 

“Then he can go to Winwin,” Ten pointed out. 

“Who talks to no one but the china line and his betas, yeah right.”

“Then Kun. Kun loves the kids,” Ten suggested. 

“Who is literally one of the most uninterested omegas. What advice can Kun give him? How to pocket cards during a magic trick? He needs advice that only you can give. He needs help. You remember how hard it was, coming to Korea, adjusting to the culture, with no one to help you? You remember what it was like to present? You remember how hard it was for you, You can’t let him go through that alone, he needs guidance, and he really looks up to you,” Johnny said and Ten sighed. 

He knew the flattery was getting to him. 

Johnny was getting to him, he always knew how to press those buttons, make him want to be better than he was. 

“Fine, I’ll try to be nicer,” Ten finally relented and Johnny smiled, kissing his stomach softly. 

“But,” Ten started and Johnny looked up at him. 

“But what?” He asked. 

“But you owe me, You have to do that thing that I like, and I expect chocolates, lots of chocolates, and none of that chocolate fruit bullshit, I’m not a child,” Ten said and Johnny rolled his eyes, pulling down Ten’s waistband. 

“You’re such a bitch,” Johnny complained and Ten grabbed his hair. 

“I’m your bitch though,” He teased, pulling harshly just because he knew Johnny didn’t like it.

“You’re my bitch,” Johnny relented fondly. 

 

Ten sat awkwardly across from Donghyuck, who was fiddling with his chopsticks. Johnny was next to him, and he knew that the alpha was looking over at him, willing him to make a move, to say something to the omega. 

“Do you- do you want to go get some coffee?” Ten asked and Donghyuck shrugged, getting out of the booth.

“Why aren’t you talking?” Ten asked as they exited the restaurant. 

“I’m not supposed to talk,” Donghyuck said and Ten rolled his eyes. 

“Who told you that omegas weren’t supposed to talk a lot?” Ten asked and Donghyuck looked over at him quickly, shaking his head. 

Donghyuck was barely taller than him, and something about that helped Ten to relax. 

“No one. It’s not an omega thing, it’s a Donghyuck thing. Mark told me that I annoy people when I talk so much, and I really don’t want to annoy you,” Donghyuck said and Ten stopped walking, stopping to look at Donghyuck, to really look at him. 

He’d been able to nest with them for a couple of months, been recognized as an omega for just as long, but Ten hadn’t really thought about what that meant for him. 

He wasn’t in with the group, not like the rest of them, he was learning the instinctive things that they’d been passing on, but he didn’t quite fit just yet.

“Hyung, why don’t you like me?” Donghyuck finally asked.

Ten knew that Donghyuck’s relationship had been somewhat strained with a lot of the older omegas, but he’d never really thought about why the younger annoyed him so much.

Then again, he did know why. 

He’d always thought he was too nosy. He always wanted to be with them, wanted to know what they talked about when they nested, wanted to know what it was like nesting. He wanted to know too much, wanted to know things that were sensitive to them. He’d always found his interests in Omegas, and their most vulnerable moments unnerving. But, now, it made complete sense. 

“Hyung loves you hyuckie. Hyung loves his dongsaeng, remember, we had a really good time when we roomed together in osaka,” He said cheerfully, trying to stop the awkward guilt he was feeling. 

“You slept in Johnny hyung’s room and made Kun sleep with me,” Donghyuck said and Ten sighed. 

He was right. 

Whenever the camera was off, he was with Johnny, talking to their daughter, avoiding Donghyuck. 

“Look, I know Hyung hasn’t always been very nice to you. It’s my fault. I didn’t understand things about you, and I didn’t like that I didn’t understand. I mistook your interest in us as something completely different, I’m sorry. I know that this has been tough on you, transitioning, and none of your hyungs have been very accommodating,” Ten finally admitted and Donghyuck shook his head. 

“That’s not true. Johnny hyung and alpha have been very accommodating,” He said and Ten snorted. 

“Oh, I’m sure Jaehyun has been more than accommodating,” Ten said with a wink and Donghyuck’s face turned red. 

“At least there’s no physical proof of just how accommodating my alpha can be,” Donghyuck said, wiping at the makeup that was on Ten’s neck and he pushed the omega with a laugh. 

“Oh trust me, there will be, just wait,” Ten said bumping into him. 

It felt nice to have someone else who was committed to their alpha like this, maybe Donghyuck and he could have a stronger relationship.


	9. Resolve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Donghyuck tries to work up the resolve to tell Taeyong of his and Jaehyun's plans to get mated

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this, Taeyong calls Donghyuck Haechan. This is a bit of a sore spot because he thinks of Haechan as his Beta name, and Donghyuck as his omega name.

Donghyuck rolled over to look at Jaehyun. The alpha was sleeping peacefully, his chest rising slowly.

“Hyung,” Donghyuck whispered, shaking him gently. Jaehyun wrapped his arm around Donghyuck in his sleep, pulling him into his side. His scent was sleep warm, and Donghyuck wanted to bury himself in it.

“Hyung!” Donghyuck said more insistently, and Jaehyun cracked an eye at him.

“What's- What's wrong?” He asked before peeking at the clock.

“Its three in the morning. Why are you awake, what’s going on?” He asked and Donghyuck paused, feeling silly for waking him.

“I just- it's nothing,” Donghyuck whispered, chickening out of speaking his mind. 

“No, it’s keeping you up, what’s wrong hyuckie?” Jaehyun asked and Donghyuck shuffled in the bed, looking up at the ceiling. 

“I want to tell the others.” 

Jaehyun shifted, turning on his side to look at Donghyuck. He smoothed a piece of hair out of his face. 

“Tell them?” Jaehyun asked and Donghyuck nodded. 

“I want to tell our members- that we want to get mated. I want to tell Dream, I want everyone to know,” He said and Jaehyun hummed.

“That’s not it, is it? What else?” He asked and Donghyuck swallowed. 

“I want to tell Taeyong hyung, personally,” He whispered and Jaehyun shifted closer to him. 

“You want to tell him before the other members?” He asked and Donghyuck nodded. 

He didn’t know why he wanted so bad to be the one to tell Taeyong. Maybe it was some kind of omega code thing, that he felt as Jaehyun’s omega, he had to tell him. He was scared to tell him, he didn’t think that he would be too mad, but he had been a little colder with him after they got back together, he couldn’t help but be afraid of what would happen when he did eventually tell him. 

He couldn’t help the smallest part of him that wanted to tell him to take the wind out of his sails, to gloat that he’d gotten Jaehyun, and not him, but that was a very small part of it. It was mostly because he felt obligated to tell him.

“I just think that it’s the right thing to do, one omega to another, you know?” He said and Jaehyun shook his head.

“You don’t owe him anything though, he and I were never anything like that. You don’t have to spare his feelings, because he never felt that way about me,” Jaehyun pointed out and Donghyuck nodded, moving so that he was laying on Jaehyun’s chest. 

“Yeah, but I still feel obligated, it’s an omega thing hyung, you don’t understand,” Donghyuck said and Jaehyun looked down at him, his face spread in a sincere smile, his dimples showing. 

“Oh, an omega thing huh?” He asked, tickling Donghyuck who squealed and hid in his chest some more.

“I give, I give,” Donghyuck wheezed out and Jaehyun stopped tickling him, leaning forward to kiss Donghyuck on the forehead. 

“Get some sleep, omega,” He whispered and Donghyuck closed his eyes, holding Jaehyun tight to him. 

He’d tell him first thing in the morning.

Donghyuck was going to tell Taeyong, he was going to march right into his room, or he was going to knock on the door--semantics really, and he was going to tell the omega that he was with Jaehyun, that they were going to be mated, that Jaehyun and him would have a claiming ceremony. 

He was going to do it. 

After he got a glass of water, he was parched, he needed some water and then he was going to tell him. 

He headed down to the kitchen to get some water so that he could quench his thirst, and then he would confront Taeyong.

Not confront- tell Taeyong. 

He wasn’t confronting him, because he wasn’t telling him something upsetting, he was just letting him know where Jaehyun and he were in their relationship. 

It was nothing big. 

“Why do you look like you’re on a suicide mission?” Taeyong asked and Donghyuck froze, his hands clenching by his side. 

“Hyung- I thought you were in your room,” Donghyuck stammered, looking up at the omega who was leaning against the counter, munching on a bowl of chips. 

“Nope, I’m here, what’s going on with you?” Taeyong asked and Donghyuck cleared his throat. 

He was going to tell him. 

He wasn’t going to tell him. 

He was going to chicken out. 

He could try again tomorrow, he would definitely do it tomorrow, there was just too much pressure on him right now. 

“Spit it out Hyuckie, you smell like latex, what’s wrong?” He asked and Donghyuck took a deep breath.

He could do this. 

“Me and alpha-- uh Jaehyun Hyung, have been talking and, we-I- um, well, we want to uh- I mean- He’s going to give me the bite, he’s going to claim me to be his mate,” Donghyuck rushed out and Taeyong just looked at him. 

Donghyuck had to bite his lips to keep the ‘say something’ in his mouth. 

He couldn’t figure out how he felt about it, but it was bothering him. 

He needed some kind of sign.

Taeyong’s eyes narrowed.

“Jesus, you’re really too young for that. Did he knock you up or something? Oh wait, that’s right, you can’t get pregnant,” Taeyong paused, his head tilting as he leaned forward slightly.

It was unsettling just how in his space Taeyong was.

“Right,  _ omega,”  _ Taeyong spoke derisively. 

Donghyuck didn’t like the way he said it, the way his lips curled up around the word omega, like it was some kind of joke, like he were some kind of joke. 

His hand flashed forward quickly, striking Taeyong across the face.

“Don’t you ever insinuate I am anything other than an omega,” Donghyuck hissed.

“Okay, Haechan,” He teased and donghyuck grabbed his shoulders, pushing him into the counter. Taeyong grabbed his hair, pulling it so that he was nearly bent in half. They went crashing into the table. 

“What are you doing!” He heard and he felt arms around his waist before he pushed against the fridge. 

The scent of Cedar and musk filled his nose and he pushed against the eldest alpha, because that was not who he wanted to be holding him right now. 

“Have you lost your damn mind?” Jaehyun yelled from where he was holding Taeyong against a wall. 

“He started it,” Taeyong complained. 

“He called me Haechan!” Donghyuck called from behind Johnny. 

“That’s your name isn’t it?” Taeyong called and Johnny’s hold got tighter as he held him tighter against the fridge as he tried to lunge at Taeyong. 

“Enough, he is your dongsaeng! I don’t know why you think you can talk to him like that. You’re out here treating your dongsaeng like that? Putting your hands on him? What the fuck is wrong with you? You’re the hyung, act like it!” Jaehyun berated and the tension on Taeyong’s face smoothed out. 

“I’m sorry, alpha,” He whispered and Jaehyun pushed him against the wall harder. 

“You should be more than sorry.” Jaehyun growled and Donghyuck watched as Taeyong submitted to Jaehyun, his head falling back against the wall as he exposed his neck to him. He could smell the heightened scent of Jasmine in the room and it made him angry because Jaehyun was supposed to be his mate, but he was pressing Taeyong against the wall, had grabbed Taeyong and not him.

He pushed out from under Johnny, running upstairs to their room.

Maybe he wouldn’t be enough for Jaehyun.


	10. Resolved

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Donghyuck feels it all crumble down

Donghyuck slammed the door behind him, running his hands through his hair. His hands were shaking and he could feel the distressed scent wafting off of him with charred earth.

He clenched his teeth at the anger wafting from him. 

Omegas didn’t get mad like this-

Underneath that he could smell the scent of lilies breaking through.

His emotions were all fucked up, because he was all fucked up and Jaehyun still loved Taeyong, he still loved Taeyong, and Donghyuck would never be a good enough omega for him. 

“Donghyuck,” He heard as the door pushed opened and he backed up against the wall, his arms crossing in front of him. 

He wished that he’d never switched rooms with Doyoung, he wished that he would have stayed with Mark, that he’d never even fallen for Jaehyun. 

He wished he was enough for one person, that one person could love him back the way he loved them. 

“What?” He bit out and Jaehyun sighed. 

“Donghyuck are you okay,” He asked as he stepped closer, reaching for Donghyuck’s hand. 

He snatched it away.

“No, no I'm not fucking okay.” Donghyuck hissed out through his teeth. He was so angry and hurt, and just so fucked up inside, and he didn’t know what he was going to do.

“Baby please, omega,” Jaehyun plead and the word set off Donghyuck.

“Don't call me that. I'm not your omega obviously. Just go be with him,” Donghyuck spat out.

“What are you talking about, You’re  _ my  _ omega, I’m  _ your  _ alpha,” Jaehyun spoke and Donghyuck shook his head. 

“No, you’re not even an alpha. And I’m not an omega, not to you, not to him. No matter how many treatments I get, how many hormones I take, I’ll never be real enough for you, I’ll never be able to give you what you want, what he can give you, what he is so fucking eager to give you. So just-- leave me alone,” Donghyuck spoke, his voice breaking. Jaehyun stepped closer to him.

“When have I ever said that you were anything but an omega?”

“You didn’t have to say it, you showed me with your actions,” Donghyuck said, gritting his teeth, he wasn’t sure if he ess doing it to keep himself from yelling at the elder man, or to keep himself from crying.

“What are you even talking about Hyuckie?” Jaehyun asked. 

“I’m talking about the way you chose him over me, the way you let him call you alpha, the way you let him  _ submit _ to you,” Donghyuck whispered, wiping at the tears in the corners of his eyes. 

“What-”

“Don’t act like you didn’t fucking smell him, I fucking smelled the slick on him, I know you had to. It’s all you ever wanted, for him to recognize you as an alpha, and you got it. Jaehyun- just go to him, please,” Donghyuck begged. 

“Hyuckie, you’re breaking my heart,” Jaehyun whispered. 

“Your heart? I’m breaking your heart? No. You don’t understand heartbreak. You don’t understand what it’s like to never be anyone’s first choice, to never be enough. You don’t understand finally feeling important only for someone prettier, older, more omega-ly to come by and snatch the one thing you were thought was only yours. I’m not stupid Jaehyun, I know that you and Taeyong had a past, I know that you fucked him- how am I supposed to react when you press him against a wall and he smells like that and you do nothing? How am I supposed to feel when Johnny hyung grabs me, and not my alpha. You were supposed to be my alpha!” He yelled at him, pushing himself off of the wall and into his face. 

“I was getting him off of you! I was protecting  _ my omega _ ! I didn’t grab him because I care about him. I grabbed him because I saw him hurting you and I lost it! What happened between me and Taeyong is the past, it has nothing to do with how I feel about you,” He argued and Donghyuck shook his head. 

“It has everything to do with how you feel about me, you came to me because Taeyong didn’t love you back, and now that he does- what am I supposed to do? I can’t do this, I can’t sit back and watch you love him and leave me behind. What happens for me? I gave you all of me, I wanted you to claim me,” Donghyuck whispered and Jaehyun raised his eyebrows. 

“Wanted?” Jaehyun whispered and Donghyuck sucked in a deep breath, taking a step back.

“I don’t- I don’t know what I want anymore,” Donghyuck whispered and Jaehyun pushed his hands through his own hair. 

“You don’t fucking know anymore? Just like that, all that we’ve been through, and you don’t fucking know if you want me?” Jaehyun asked. 

“I’m young, Taeyong’s right, I’m too young to be claimed, and he’s older and it’s just- he matches with you better,” Donghyuck whispered and Jaehyun grabbed Donghyuck’s shoulders, holding him still. 

“Fuck what Taeyong says, do you know where he is right now? He’s on his way to go fuck YJ, he doesn’t care about me, he cares that he isn’t the center of my universe anymore. He doesn’t love anyone but himself, and I can’t, and I won’t let him ruin this for me. I love  _ you _ Donghyuck. I love you from the tip off your head to the bottom of your feet. I love everything about you, no matter what. I loved you as a beta, and I love you as an omega. I don’t fucking care that you can’t give me children, I don’t care that you’ll have to take hormones forever, I don’t care about any of that. I care about the fact that you are in my arms when I sleep, and that you’re the first thing I see when I wake up. I want you, only you,” Jaehyun growled out and Donghyuck shook his head. 

“I- I just- there’s too much on my mind, I don’t know what to think anymore. I just- I need some space,” Donghyuck whispered, watching as Jaehyun deflated. 

“Space, you need space?” Jaehyun asked, his voice shaky and Donghyuck dropped his head in his hands.

“Maybe you’re right, maybe you are too young,” Jaehyun said.

“I’m sorry hyung,” Donghyuck breathed. 

“Don’t worry Hyuckie, I’ll give you all the space that you need,” Jaehyun whispered before grabbing his jacket and leaving the room, slamming the door behind him. 

Donghyuck watched him leave before collapsing onto the floor beside of Jaehyun’s bed, cradling his knees to his chest as sobs wracked through him. 


	11. Ending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Donghyuck confronts his feelings about Jaehyun.

Donghyuck picked up his phone, his chest heaving. He didn't want to be alone, but he was still too mad and hurt to call Jaehyun back.

“Injunnie?” Donghyuck whispered into the receiver.

“What's wrong,” Renjun asked and Donghyuck took a deep breath. 

“Jaehyun, He-” He started before dissolving into tears.

“What did that bastard do? If he hurt you, I swear I'm going to kill him. Are you at the dorm, is he still there? Are any of the hyungs there?” Renjun started to go off and Donghyuck cut in.

“He didn't- he didn't hit me, He just-”

“He just what? Just because you guys are dating- it doesn't make it okay for him to do certain things, you don't have to have sex with him just because he wants to.”

“He didn't do  _ that _ either- he… he grabbed Taeyong. He chose Taeyong over me,” Donghyuck weeped, feeling dejected.

“What- How?”

“Me and Taeyong got into a fight, and he- he pulled Taeyong away and pinned him down and Taeyong submitted to him and I-” 

“What did you fight about?”

“I told Taeyong that me and Hyung were planning on getting mated, that he was going to claim me.”

He heard Renjun let out a sigh and he waited for the other omega to say something.

“You're way too young for that hyuck,” Renjun finally breathed out, his voice sounding heavy.

“That's what Taeyong said,” Donghyuck hissed bitterly. 

“Like, I know Taeyong's been a bitch, but he's right. You're only eighteen, and he's- he's a lot older than you, you’re not ready for that, trust me,” Renjun explained and Donghyuck deflated.

He understand why Renjun felt that way. He'd been against his and Jaehyun's relationship from the start, and with good reason. Renjun had his own bad history with Alphas and early matings, and he didn't want anyone to have the same fate.

“Jaehyun isn't Ji Suk,” Donghyuck said and Renjun sighed.

“I know that. But, you're young, why are you so eager to jump into this? Is it because you love him? Or is it because if he claims you, you beat Taeyong? Are you sure you're not just trying to make sure Taeyong can’t have him?”

He didn't want to admit it, but maybe Renjun was right, maybe he was rushing into this for the wrong reasons. 

There was a knock on his door and he looked up. He already knew who it was, the chocolate and strawberry scent giving him away.

“Ten hyung is outside my door, I'll call you later, “ Donghyuck said before hanging up. 

“Yes?” Donghyuck said as he opened the door and Ten pushed past him, dropping down on his bed.

“I'm glad you punched that bitch in the face, he deserved it,” Ten said and Donghyuck found himself laughing through his tears.

“What?”

“I know he's my best friend, but he has been a cunt lately about you and Jaehyun,” Ten said and Donghyuck's face crumpled at the mention of Jaehyun.

“Oh, come here, I'm sorry,” Ten soothed, holding his arms out. Donghyuck climbed onto the bed, letting Ten hug him as he cried.

“What happened?” Ten asked as he petted through Donghyucks hair.

Donghyuck explained what happened, how angry and hurt he'd been when Taeyong called him  _ Haechan  _ and how much more it hurt to see Taeyong submit to his alpha, how Jaehyun let him submit to him and how he chose Taeyong. It hurt to watch Jaehyun walk out on him, and he felt like he wasn’t worth it.

“I just- I'm not enough for him, maybe I'll never be enough for him,” Donghyuck whispered.

“Why don't you think you're enough for him?”

“Because have you seen me? And compared to Taeyong-”

“Stop comparing yourself to Taeyong.”

“Well how do I do that? He's slept with Taeyong, he came to me because Taeyong turned him down. Why would he choose me over a real omega-”

“Stop it, that's- you're a real omega hyuck. Jaehyun loves you, not Taeyong. He chose you. I know it's a lot right now, and Taeyong shouldn't have called you Haechan. He shouldn't have insinuated that you were anything other than omega. He was wrong in that. You're good hyuck. You can't keep making yourself miserable and keep picking fights, I know,” Ten said before sighing. 

“When I got pregnant with Madee and they sent me to America, I did the same thing. I used to pick fights with Johnny all the time. I used to say the worst things to him, because I was scared. I was scared that he would think he made a mistake, that now that I wasn't there, he'd see how much easier it was to be without me. He was in a permanent group. He could be free and have any omega he wanted now, and even though Madee is a blessing, I couldn’t help but think that I was making a big mistake, and that Johnny wouldn’t wait for me.”

“How did you fix it?” He asked and Ten shook his head. 

“I talked to him, I told him how I felt. I'd felt so alone, and when I went into labor without him, I realized just how alone I'd been, and how I hadn't really talked to Johnny about it. I realized I needed him, and when I told him, he was relieved because now he knew what was going on, and we could work on it, work on us,” Ten explained and Donghyuck sniffled.

He understood what he was saying. 

“Do you think I'm too young to mate with hyung?” Donghyuck asked and Ten hummed.

“Do you think you're too young to mate with him?” he asked and Donghyuck knew what the right answer was, but he also knew what he wanted to say.

“I-”

“You don't have to answer that. Just think about it. You're young, but you're not stupid. I trust your judgement, “ He said before hugging Donghyuck tightly. 

“Sleep, okay? I’ll stay until you fall asleep okay?” Ten said and Donghyuck nodded, wiping his eyes on Ten’s shirt.

He was still so sad and he had so much to think about. 

He welcomed the sleep and the promise of a reprieve from this pain.

 

Donghyuck opened his eyes at the sound of tapping at his door. His head hurt slightly and his face and eyes felt puffy.

He was a wreck, he knew that. 

The tapping started again and Donghyuck cleared his throat.

He knew who it was at the door, the basil and camphor scent giving it away.

“Hyuckie?” Jaehyun called through the door. His voice was rough, as if he'd been crying as well.

He hated that he made Jaehyun sound like that.

“Hyung,” Donghyuck breathed and Jaehyun knocked on the door once, his scent filtering in more clearly.

It was tinged in sadness, the cold icicle scent meandering through the room.

“Can I come in,” Jaehyun asked, and Donghyuck ran his hands through his hair, trying to wipe away the signs of his distress.

“Come in,” Donghyuck called and Jaehyun pushed open the door. 

They started at each other for a second, unsure of what to do next, whether they could cross the awkward space between them. 

“I'm sorry,” Jaehyun blurted out, and Donghyuck shook his head, wishing that Jaehyun would cross the room.

“Why are you apologizing?”Donghyuck asked and Jaehyun cleared his throat. 

“I'm sorry if you thought Taeyong- I'm sorry I made you think that Taeyong is anything other than a hyung to me. You're my mate, at least the person I want to be mated with. I should have grabbed you,” Jaehyun admitted. 

“You didn't-” Donghyuck stopped short. 

Donghyuck was a wreck last night, and he didn’t want to invalidate his feelings.

He'd been so angry, and hurt, and even after talking with the other omegas,  he has mixed feelings.

But he had made up his mind, and he knew that in the end, it was the right decision. 

“I was hurt by you Jaehyun-”

“I know and I-”

“I'm not done. I was hurt by you, but I was hurt more by myself. I went through a lot in such a short amount of time, and I never gave myself a chance to figure it out, figure myself out. I'm young hyung, I'm really young, and I'm new at being an omega physically. We jumped into a lot of this really quickly, and we did a lot of things right and wrong.”

“So you're breaking up with me again?” Jaehyun asked and Donghyuck swallowed the tears he felt burgeoning at the hurt in Jaehyun's voice.

“I am really immature, and insecure, and I barely know myself right now. I'm not- I'm not breaking up with you hyung. I don't want to break up with you, because I love you. I just think we should slow down.  I think we should just postpone the mating, Just for two years, give me time to mature into an omega who is ready for mating, I'm not going anywhere,” Donghyuck said and Jaehyun shook his head with a soft smile, inching closer to Donghyuck.

“I'm not going anywhere either,” He said and Donghyuck smiled.

“You think you can wait on me?” He asked and Jaehyun nodded.

“As long as you'll wait for me,” He said before crossing the room and finally wrapping his arms around Donghyuck's shoulders. 

This wasn’t an ending, and for the first time in a long time, it didn't feel so dire.

He could wait for Jaehyun to claim him, and maybe along the way he could figure out exactly who he was.


End file.
